“Coming to work is my way to de-stress,” someone recently shared with me.
I did not know what to say because I could not fully relate. My life and play after I clock out to do the things I want to do them and when I do them are vital to me. Spending time with the people I love and care about, my health, my time, and my freedom matter more than a job could ever mean to me.
“Don’t get me wrong,” she hurried to explain, “I love my family, but it can be just really stressful dealing with family stuff. Work is easy, relaxing, and predictable…not to mention that there really isn’t any choice to work to feed the family and make ends meet. Compared to family stuff, work is a breeze—especially when we ALL have to get together and there is a huge clash of personalities and preferences.”
Someone once said to me, “Family gatherings are like business meetings where you all have to attend, but no one REALLY wants to attend.”
For me, I am grateful for every moment with my immediate family of my father, stepmom, and older sister. I think I feel this way because us four are this in one word: Oddballs. Yes, every single Wu in the immediate Wu crew is an oddball from what we has happened in our lives, how we faced and tackled it, and how we survived to share with others. We have led and are still living out very unique lives and, most of all, we simply do not fit society’s mold of how to be and what has been expected of us. My extended family that I am related to is another story—each of them fit the society molds of marriage, children, well-paid and predictable jobs, and what appears outside to be the simple and predictable lives. I have little to talk about with them and end up with superficial and surface topics of weather and food to then having awkward pauses. Suffice to say, I can’t last long with superficial talk that I end up getting bored with and crave in-depth conversation that entice me and, I like to think, work out my brain and feelings in the best of ways.
I think that there are many things in life that we do not want to do, but must do out of responsibility, ownership, expectations, and even guilt. Guilt is a powerful weapon that drives us to often do what we do not want to do, but have to do. All of these for a greater good. All of these are essentially sacrifices. I have always been a meticulous person, but I am more about seeing and being in the bigger picture for the greater good that is about ‘we’ and not ‘me.’ I am coming to understand just how powerful we are as individuals that can affect an entire group and even more. As I have gotten older, I have gotten quieter in these sacrifice situations where ‘it is what it is’ and the choice is to accept what must be done rather than what I want to do. People will say that we always have a choice, but I do think we are put in positions in life where we feel trapped and do not have a choice until time comes along with choices that we decide upon. Just about everything in life is timing. Just about everything in life is the balance of the ‘we’ and ‘me.’ People will say many things on the outside to you when they really have no clue what you are going through on the inside.
What is your idea of a sacrifice? Have you shared about your sacrifice(s) for those you sacrificed for? When have you ‘sacrificed’? Are you able to see big pictures or are you meticulous? What is a sacrifice? What exactly is ‘the greater good’?
Keep smilin’ until we meet again,